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Screwy News - Tuesday July 26, 2011

In Florida over the weekend, a couple of 62 year old nudists were injured when they crashed a jet ski. A jet ski that someone had let them borrow. And ride in the nude. There isn't enought bleach in the world to make it sanitary. The woman suffered cuts and bruises...the man was airlifted out with two broken arms. Their exposed naughty bits were unharmed.

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On Saturday, in South Africa, a man suffered a major asthma attack. His family thought he had died, so they called an undertaker to come cart him off to the morgue. Twenty-one hours later the guy woke - up..found himself in a morgue refrigerator..and FREAKED OUT...doctors have checked him out and he was actually alright. The same thing happened to me at church last week.

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Memphis: trouble at Piccadilly. Erica Mathews wanted something else to drink, and apparently didn't mind cutting in line at the Piccadilly to get it sunday afternoon. That didn't set too well with customer Joe Allen, who chastised Mathews." you could say excuse me" Allen said. Mathews didn't like it and started throwing plates and food at Allen, all the while saying she had a gun. She told the man she had something else for him outside the restaurant on Elvis Presley blvd, then came back with a baseball bat. She started swing away and was arrested for disorderly conduct.

no word on whether she got her drink refilled.

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07/26/2011 4:43AM
Screwy News - Tuesday July 26, 2011
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